Generally speaking we learn that the walls we build around ourselves are negative. I do not know the statistics, but a wall by any other name is still meant to keep something out. One of the most impressive books I read on this topic is Broken Open by Omega co-founder Elizabeth Lesser. It is an excellent read and I recommend it to anyone seeking to deepen their spirituality.
Currently I am working through some personal turmoil, so I have been sensitive to the issue. That is why when I saw the new Pixar movie “Inside Out” I immediately picked up on the story of a young girl learning to manage her emotions. (Elizabeth wrote a Facebook post on the movie, check it out here.) Rather than another story about a person learning to let the good in, this was a story about learning to let the bad in, so the healing could begin.
Personally I am not an optimist, nor am I a pessimist. I see myself as a spiritualist. My reality is based in the truth teachings I study and I try to base my actions on the same truths. With this in mind, I always try to stay positive and anticipate that good things will happen. When things do not go as I expect, I understand that it must be karma or the Universal Laws at play. I look for the lesson to be learned and I move on. I never thought of this mindset as a wall. I thought of this as a proper way to live my spiritual life. Today I am looking at it differently.
Previously, whenever something bad happened, I would sit with the situation, ask for understanding, and release it back to God (my higher power). I tried not to get angry or be hurt. I did not dwell in it and I encouraged myself to move on. I came to be like this after a period of negativity in my life. I was dwelling in anger and pain, never truly learning the art of letting go. My pendulum swung the other way after working out of my negativity. Rather than keeping the good out, I learned to keep the bad out.
Who can blame me? In metaphysics we are taught to stay positive, release negativity, and to learn from ourselves. The past is over, the future is not set, so stay present. I was not purposely keeping negative emotions out, I felt I was working through my emotions. It appears as though I need some more work, but don’t we all.
I have come to learn that regardless of the intent, the walls we build keep things out. There needs to be a balance between the positive and the negative. Sadness allows joy, just as darkness gives way to light. The following quote came while writing this today, “For the application in self, the TRY, the effort, the energy expended in the proper direction, is all that is required of THEE. God giveth the increase.” (Edgar Cayce 601-11)
It refers to the energy expended in proper direction, it does not state whether the energy or direction is positive or negative. It simply states that the effort is all that is necessary. This quote gives me hope and guidance.
Now that I have identified my wall of positivity, I need to restructure it. My intent is to avoid building walls altogether. Fortunately I do not have to start over; I have experienced the negative and I have recognized the positive. It is time to find an honest balance in my spiritual life.
“Start where you are.” – Edgar Cayce